Just in case you needed a quick break from all the turkey, here's the quick and dirty lowdown on all the dating insanity! Brief notes on a few sites below and I'll be back tomorrow to pontificate on the meaning of it all...Happy Christmas!

ON THE CHOPPING BLOCK: Singlesnet, Be2, Match, Chemistry, Jdate, Nerve/Fastcupid, Eharmony, Yahoo! Personals, TrulyMadlyDating, BeautifulPeople

BEEN THERE, DONE THAT: Lavalife, PlentyofTweeps, PlentyofFish, DatingBetter

BRAND SPANKING NEW: Flirtbox, Kizmeet, OkCupid, Millionairematch, Friendfinder, SeekingArrangement, BadOnlineDates, Spark, Omnidate

Millionairematch: what? I have to try them all! Yes, it's as hokey as it sounds. Signed up on this one for Vancouver - very few in metro Van and I'd be very, very surprised if any of these men actually had any money. Really guys? Really? I'd imagine any self-respecting millionaire wouldn't want a public, searchable profile - but hey, that's just me.

Seekingarrangment - Ha! ....and I’m pretty sure if you’re signed up on this one, you’re a guaranteed douchebag! Oops, did I say that out loud? I’m so glad that Seekingarrangement runs this warning as you sign your rights away: “Please take note that we prohibit anyone from promoting illegal activities (such as prostitution)… If you are an ESCORT, please do not join this website.” – ooo, I’m sure that works wonders! I had to sign up as a "sugar baby" and specify the monthly budget of support I was looking for (I went with "open/negotiable") and yes, I did throw up in my mouth, just a little. Ok, a lot. But they offered a lifetime membership to Lindsay Lohan after she got dumped by Samantha Ronson last spring (or hadn’t you heard?) – I mean, how could I not investigate such an amazing opportunity for a young, screwed up woman to post her entire life in a public, searchable space so that she can sort through profiles of um….I dunno. Dirtbags with gobs of money? Or dirtbags pretending to have gobs of money? Gee, I wonder if Lindsay turned them down! Totally classy Sugar Baby pic (#1) is below.

Datingbetter: Ever try searching your username after signing up on one of these sites? Dating.com makes your profile public and searchable to members -- and to the public. As in, my username popped up right at the top of my google search and then gave me complete access to the profile and pic while I was logged out of my account. (Plenty of Tweeps does the same thing). Datingbetter is another classy one using pics of hooker-women in their designs. Which is fine if that’s what you’re selling – but they say it’s not. Make up your own mind: Pic #2

(download)

Click here to download:

24_Sites_on_the_25th_A_Happy_X.zip (208 KB)

Singlesnet: Seriously, not a collection of men who inspire confidence and 2/3 of “local” Vancouver choices are in Washington. If only pics were taken by someone who could explain to these guys that a sunny day and a smile do wonders for first impressions...also that bare lightbulbs and your bleak basement/laundry room clearly visible in pic make you look like the unabomber. Just saying.

OmniDate: Virtual dating! Award winner for creepiest dating site I’ve signed up on to date - let alone creepiest collection of male pics. If there was anything to pay attention to in their profiles I didn't notice because I was too baffled by the rest of it. Why, why, why would I want to use an Avatar that looks like a hooker to represent me during an online date with men who look like guys I'd cross the street to avoid?

OkCupid: Described as “free, fun & smart” – and so far, does seem to be. Profiles are very well written – I have to admit I did actually go back to re-write mine because I felt like an underachiever after reading some of the interesting ones. No Vancouver presence unfortunately, so I signed up for Seattle - and even then I'm getting contacted by guys in Portland. Overall I wish that there was less going on with the site – and that they’d stop badgering me to play the match games. But generally this one seems like a big plus.I mean, considering the alternatives.

PlentyofTweeps: Sent emails and “likes” to three guys on Plenty of Tweeps – asked if they’d like to meet for coffee. Received one response after a few days:

Subject: Re: hi

What are your qualifications?

Have we met?

Ummm….right. Elected not to respond. The Vancouver-based pool of 30 – 40 year olds remained unchanged in the 2 1/2 odd weeks since I signed up: including one co-founder twice (who, from his twitter feed, appears to be attached), his business partner, another member I’ve been advised has a girlfriend and is only there for research purposes, and qualifications guy who doesn’t seem to understand the concept of a dating site. After finding out that POT profiles are searchable on google (as noted above), decided to delete my account. Except go figure, there’s nowhere to do it! Clever. And extremely annoying. So I deleted the twitter account I created for the site. Which still, even more frustrating, leaves my photo up on the site as a recent visitor and dead link. Apparently I have to deal with my profile footprints surviving on POT until site traffic eventually tramples out my path. Ugh.

Badonlinedates: “This dating and social network has been created to turn negative dating experiences into positive ones” – ok, fair enough. The site is indeed a bit quirky, there's some kind of a web series I couldn't be bothered to watch, if you care, you can upload video content and you do get to add a little blurb about your worst date, which is fun. But the site doesn't actually do anything about changing the dating process. Same old profile sign-ups, same old gallery search and shopping. And zero West Coast presence: 2 men within 100 miles of Seattle . 79 within 100 miles of a Beverly Hills zip code.

argh...Perfect Match canceled today (not his fault since I had to cancel at the last minute yesterday) but he can't reschedule until next week. I need to step it up with the date-scheduling or I'll be halfway through the month with only two dates under my belt! Problem I'm finding is that the guys on Match are really hard to pin down to an actual in-person date: I've been emailing with a few - some have even been oddly rude - why respond if you're not going to be nice?? Chemistry is still an absolute mystery as to how to connect beyond the guided steps and am now wondering whether these profiles are active members considering there's SO little movement. Haven't communicated with a single member directly yet.

Truly Madly isn't local enough (I have a rather eager suitor in the UK - don't care how cute he is, I'm not flying to the UK to date a stranger!), and I haven't seen any movement on Plenty of Tweeps...but to be fair I didn't approach anyone because I thought the law of averages (like on POF) had to work out that at least ONE guy would say hi. Although it seemed to be mostly tech guys, so maybe law of averages didn't apply. Oh who knows. Screw it. Time to be aggressive! Which unfortunately means dropping more money on memberships so I don't have to wait around like a wilting flower to get some random guy's email...eventually.

You know - this is a very different online dating landscape. Used to be that as a girl - you could join a site and know that you'd never need to pay because the guys well,  would. And there would be generally interesting guys somewhere in the midst of the haystack. SOMEWHERE. And once these haystack men made contact, you could then email back without having to pay yourself. I can't quite figure out why, but this is no longer the case. Partially it's the change in how memberships are set up - but partially it's how men are using the sites. Or maybe who. I'm not really sure I understand who the men are - but apparently they vastly outnumber the women by hundreds of thousands. Okay, I'm making that number up. I have no idea.

Anyways - I'm on it! Even if I have to set 5 dates a day, I'll do it! Just, you know, don't expect me to keep them straight. Or to not whine about it.

p.s. This doesn't count, but I have "yay it's friday" drinks with Russian Roulette on Friday. He said he's "warming up to the idea of "Russian Roulette Episode 2: French Connection". Ha! I think I forgot to mention he's French. That's not like "Episode 2: Guys who like Role Playing" - get your minds out of the gutter! Anyways, he knows that hanging out with me before the end of 30 Sites means anything is fair game for the blog - but then, he knows where to come back to read about it and technically has every right to blow my cover if I trash him. So fair game both ways.  woo!

Four down...26 to go! No, this is just sign-ups. what? you thought I'd be dating already? ha! um, yeah so did I. Keep reading.

Last night I sat down and started out with Plenty of Tweeps (new local baby), Match, Chemistry and Eharmony. Took me less than 6 minutes to sign up for Plenty of Tweeps (yay!) although that would be because everyone is ignoring the request to fill out the personal bio so I did too – which, in the other sign-ups turned out to be the least tedious part. Go figure. Meanwhile I was PRAYING for Chemistry’s “Helen-Fisher vetted” questionnaire to end and had to get drunk just to drag myself to through the last stage of Eharmony’s. (Which also turned out to still be another FIVE pages from the end). I swear I was trying to be as truthful as possible (my knee-jerk response to generic armchair-psychology-style questionnaires is – gasp! – inappropriate sarcasm…but I am TRYING) …and Eharmony was bugging me with their questions about sexual compatibility – which you have to answer – and which really are none of their business or (more to the point) how I would ever choose to look for someone to date by multiple choice – so by the time I got to the short answer “name three things you’re thankful for” I said: my family, Vancouver and potatoes.

Well it’s true. I love them.

So. Quick re-cap.

Plenty of Tweeps: Free.

Usability: meh. We’ll see. Had to sign up for a new twitter account aside from my work one because there’s no way I’d want work connected to the site…it’s just too public. So now Dating Me looks like Loser Me With No Friends. Which kind of works against you in POT world. I know, deep.

Match: Free if I only want to wink. I think I'll do the free winking and let the guys on this one get in touch with me. (Unless I have to pay to read mail...argh, I didn't check. Well, I guess we'll find out!)

Usability: Easy enough, seem to be a lot guys in Vancouver but to be blunt, out of about 60 (40? Quick scan, there was wine) I only saw one attractive pic. Match also in a class action suit about dead profiles – they deny. Curious. Especially since all of these clearly had a note saying active within 24 hours to 3 days. But maybe that's WHY. Ooo - intrigue!

Chemistry: $49.95/ One month – 10 matches for me which I was privvy to after the never-ending profiling, but you have to pay to get in touch. Which I did, oh joys.

Usability: Meh. 2 of the 10 seem of interest. You get 5 new a day. I’m curious if they have that many in Vancouver - this morning there were only 3 new. Where are my 5 dammit! Also the communication set-up is for toddlers – it’s too annoying to explain in full but there are still like, three more baby steps before I can even email with these guys. Shoot me now. For $49/month someone should be able to say hello without jumping hoops. We are not teenagers.

E-Harmony: $59.95/One month – same deal as Chemistry. Have to pay to get in touch and E-Harmony won’t show you pics til you pay. Only got six matches here.

Usability: Also has the fify-ways to Sunday steps before you can actually contact anyone. What does a girl have to do to get a phone number around here?? Kidding. But here’s my question – Eharm’s pricing is very clearly geared towards getting you on their 12-month plan. On the 12-month? $19.95/month (for plunking down $239.40 up front). Not exactly suggesting that their system works is it? Who the heck wants to be on here for a year? Just saying.

All the sites had profile & pic approvals, so I believe I've just been unleashed on the (few) online men of the world...(stay tuned for video blogs - starting later this week!